What pushes us to make these shaky promises?
Who are we talking to – ourselves or some internal or external Bully voice that is demanding behavior we are not doing – and certainly not ready to do?
By filling our heads with ‘good intentions’ we create an internal push/pull that takes energy.
The intention – since it is not actually happening – becomes a ‘should’ that we then often feel a need to defend ourselves against!
DANCE WITH IT! EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas...
THE GOOD INTENTIONS DANCE
Check this one out:
Think of something you’ve been promising yourself to do. Does this dialogue sound familiar?
VOICE ONE: You should be doing…whatever
VOICE TWO: Yeah, I know you’re right. I mean to, but…
VOICE ONE: No buts!
VOICE TWO: No, really, I do plan on doing it! It’s just that…
VOICE ONE: No excuses!
VOICE TWO: I’m trying…
Voice One is your internal Bully and Voice Two is your Victim voice – and on this one their paths are obviously not coming together!
Now replay this dialogue with a different type of Voice One:
Try out a few different styles.
Compassionate: I know this is difficult for you…
Acknowledging: I know you really don’t want to do…
Cheerleading: Come on, let’s try it! I’m with you all the way!
Bribing/Dealmaking: If you do it, I’ll give you…
How does Voice Two respond to each of these styles?
Give it a shot and see what happens!
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