Friday, August 7, 2015


Many animal species define their 'home range' with what are called 'sign posts' - messages that other animals can read in order to avoid creating conflict and aggression.  read more

In order to take care of ourselves and create a sense of security in our lives, we humans need to be aware that personal boundaries are very important to us.  The more conscious we become of our need to create and reinforce our boundaries the safer and more respected we feel. 

Obviously, humans don't create these markers by spraying like some other animal species.  Our markers are more verbal.  They are also indicated by body language and facial expression.

As much as it seems a paradox, the more tuned in to creating healthy personal space we are, the more comfortable we become with intimacy and sharing!

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

Part of our sense of physical security is created by the 'boundaries' we set up between ourselves and others.  Even in very intimate relationships we need healthy boundaries.

Here are some questions to ask yourself as you think about boundaries:
1)  Auditory 
          How much noise or silence do you need to feel comfortable? 
          In your own home?
          At a meal?
          In the gym or other public place?

2)  Visual
          How much visual 'load' creates a sense of comfort for you?

3)  Physical proximity
          In some cultures people stand right next to each other.        
In others we step back.  How close or far from others - friends?  strangers? - creates the most comfort for you?

What can you do to ensure the degree of boundaries you need?

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