Young children emote without restraint.
"Ouch!" is often followed by a scream and cries of anger. This is probably part of our natural survival pattern - it ensures that babies are heard and our species continues to exist.
When actors are up on a stage 'emoting' we applaud them - the stage creates the perfect safe distance. Likewise, watching a movie, no matter how involved we feel, still provides that emotional safety zone that being in an audience creates.
However, when someone directs this same emotion at us in person, the intensity of this coiled energy can hit with the force of a fist!
DANCE WITH IT! EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun
LEARNING TO AVOID THROWING WILD PUNCHES: THE WORLD OF INDIRECT HITS
Are you about to spew?
Before acting out your anger, ask yourself who you are really angry at.
Is it the person you are about to 'express yourself' to?
Who is your real target?
And who are you going to use as a dumpee?
Think about it!
If you are yelling at me - about someone else you are angry at - they are feeling no pain… I AM!
Hmmm… Does this make sense?
Here's a different strategy:
Let yourself feel the agitation.
Tell yourself it's okay to be angry, it's just a feeling…
Release some of the intensity in a non-invasive, non-destructive way.
Hit something - not a person! A punching bag is great and so is a pillow
Yell into that pillow and then hit it!
Now ask yourself what you need to do about your feeling - this is the strategy stage. The goal is to make a decision that is good for you…
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