Sadly, it starts at a really early age. Our well-meaning parents, frightened for us, shout, "Pay attention! What are you doing!?"
They are scared that harm will befall us … and frightened of the criticism of others. 'What will the ubiquitous THEY think?'
The next step in this process is that we begin to internalize that voice at moments of real or perceived danger - "Pay attention, watch out, be careful!" we scold ourselves mimicking the voices of our elders…
DANCE WITH IT! EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…
8 STEPS TO FREEDOM
1) Step back and describe the situation that has triggered your bully voice.
2) Do you really think you should always be able to be perfect?
3) How could you really know what was going to happen?
4) Visualize your inner bully, listen to the sound of its voice, does it come with a smell…sulfur, perhaps…
5) Cui bono? Who's getting off on the self immolation?
6) Start a dialog with that part of you. You can use your hands like puppets and give each side a sentence to start with and then really let yourself get into it and see where the dialog goes.
Usually laughter is a good sign…
7) Celebrate freedom from that nagging… for the moment!
8) Stay vigilant - recognize opportunities for your inner bully and be preemptive!