SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - SOMETIMES IT'S REALLY HARD!

Where do we get our unrealistic ideas about life from?

Movies, books, fairy tales, sometimes even parents and teachers trying to protect us from 'harsh' reality.

But think about it…

If we hold onto these illusions the next step is delusion and disappointment!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

THINK ABOUT THE 'MAKE-BELIEVE' YOU'VE HELD ONTO.

The perfect endings…

The happily ever afters…

The love, love, love…

The land of no jealousy, no anger, no envy…

The land of easy, peasy…

NOW THINK ABOUT HOW MANY TIMES THESE BELIEFS CAME TRUE.

How do you feel when reality crashes against fantasy?

What happens to you?

NOW IMAGINE YOU ARE ABLE TO SEE REALITY AS ACCEPTABLE…

You understand that the struggles are tough but valuable.

That the learning is amazing and rich

That you actually end up appreciating yourself and others even more…

IT'S OKAY TO BE HUMAN!

"I'm so down in the dumps…I don't know what's wrong with me!"

She was talking to me after a morning of one mini-disaster after another.

"I'm really sad," he sighed.

"My best friend is moving out of town.  I’m such a wimp!  What's wrong with me?"

What do ya say?

Do you know what's wrong with them?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - THE GIFT OF MINDFULNESS

Mindfulness allows us to appreciate the moments - the tiny bits of beauty - that are truly parts of all of our lives.

The echo of a birdsong, the silly antics of a puppy, the smell of Spring, the changing shadows as clouds pass overhead…

Why are these moments important?

They provide us with life enhancing time out and make all the difficult moments doable!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

LOOK FOR MAGIC!

This gift doesn't take practice to find or special tools - it's all around you!  Can you see it?

As your day ends, review your moments - the spontaneous smiles, the eye opening sights, the scents, the pleasures that you discover…

As you breathe in allow these sensory experiences to fill your reality.

What happens?

'NEN' MINDFULNESS

The little girl was walking in the woods and came across a small - really tiny - wooden hut on stilts.

On the miniature porch were some beautifully wrapped cakes.

She found a log nearby and sat watching a spider at work on a giant web.  It was so large if she made a circle with her arms it still wouldn't fit…

Little drops of dew caught on the silken strands and sparkled in the sunlight.

She watched and breathed in the magic.

What do ya say?

Do you remember some magic moments?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - DIVERSITY WHAT A TRIP!

It seems that we are sometimes trained from an early age to separate the world into 'them' and 'us'.

We learn to create boundaries.

Sadly, if we continue this limiting belief into adulthood we rip ourselves off from much of the richness available to us!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

IMAGINARY JOURNEYS

Imagine, as a child, you were able to visit different cultures - to magically and safely 'drop in' and sample the food, music, color and beliefs of many different places…

TAKE A JOURNEY:

HUG A FURRY BABY

Visit the Giant Panda preserve in Chengdu, China.

RIDE A CAMEL

Experience the majesty of the desert and the pyramids of Egypt

ENJOY A DANCE

Visit with the Gitanos in the south of Spain

FLOAT

Immerse yourself in the magic of the Dead Sea in Israel

And as you travel, imagine (remember this is magic - language is no barrier!), being able to talk to everyone you meet - sharing sounds, thoughts, stories and appreciation!

GUNG HAY FAT CHOY

Happy Chinese New Year!

2018 is the Year of the Dog.

What?  You don't celebrate?

Why not?

Not your holiday?

We are a country of diversity.  This is our strength and our gift.

Think about the many things the Chinese culture has brought us…

Food and cooking style

Philosophy

Martial Arts

Acupuncture

Art

Color…

What do ya say?

Can you celebrate?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - MONSTER GOALS

We grow up with so many rules about winning - what it means, how to achieve it, how long it should take…

A+  A+  A+

But

We don't learn much about the many twists and turns along the path - how to appreciate them, learn from them and actually incorporate them into our journey!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

UPGRADE YOUR GOALS

1)  Play detective and ask yourself what is actually getting in the way.

2)  Where are the dead bodies, ie. old parental tapes that trip us up.

3)  Don't try harder - try different!  Pushing is 'mushing'. 

4)  Don't trigger your internal bully!  Scolding yourself is a guarantee of resistance!  Find a new rhythm.

5)  Check the mechanism: Is your goal realistic?  Do you really want to attain it?  Any reasons not to? 

FAILURE - WHAT A CONCEPT

"I have been trying so hard but no matter what I do, nothing works!"

Sound familiar?

"I feel like such a loser!  Fail!  Fail!  Fail!"

What do ya say?

Ever been down this path?

How do you deal?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - POOR PITIFUL ME

What's the deal with whining?

At times we are all tempted to give in to the 'feel sorry for ourselves and spray it all over everyone else' urge.

That poor pitiful me song resonates in some deep, dark, dank and dingy cellar in all of us…

But seriously, does it do any good?

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

RX FOR PPM (POOR, PITIFUL ME)

Before you drop it on anyone else, get into the act for yourself .

EXAGGERATE IT!  Take it to the max, get into your movie star persona and really play it…AAH OOO!

Your goal is to release tension in a healthy, non-destructive way.

As you do this, you might surprise yourself and actually start to laugh!  

Feel better?

    

SAY WHAT?

He sounded so bad I thought he was dying…

"Are you okay?" I asked.

"No," he groaned.  "I'm terrible, so sick…"  He moaned.

How do you respond to that?  This really bad flu was going around.  

"Must be that," I thought, preparing for the worst.

With a self pitying, croaking whimper he informed me of his diagnosis… He had a cold.

What do ya say?

You don't do this, right?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - CLEAR SPACES

There really is an emotional magnetic pull - we've all experienced it:  dark attracting dark. 

It's easy to be seduced by the undertow, especially since it takes energy and determination to break that pull.

Imagine two powerful magnets pulling towards each other.  If they are strong enough that tug can be intense.

Now imagine your emotional states having a similar powerful charge, especially those loaded with old negative history.

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

BREAKING THE PULL

1)  Identify the downward pull (eg. something bad happens)

2)  Describe the seduction of this negative energy by consciously saying your old refrain (eg. it always…they always…)

3)  Create a breather (eg. music, dancing, running, smelling flowers…)

4)  Now find your new mantra (if nothing comes to you, borrow it from a song, a nursery rhyme…)

Try it!

What happens?

HANG ON THERE!

Sometimes it just feels like the tilt of the earth's axis is waaay off!

No matter how much you try, that dizzying spin continues.

Things break, people are mean. Stuff gets lost…

We've all been there!  




And sometimes, it is really tempting when the outside world is out of control, to jump right in to all sorts of dark 'it's never gonna' change places.

The truth is, if we can find that inner balance, sooner or later, while we're hanging in, the tilt straightens out.

What do ya say?

How do you support yourself through the tilts?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - WHAT'S YOUR PRESET?

We all have default positions.

They are the emotional places we go when we need to feel safe - when something feels off kilter in our lives - a loss, a change, a negative interaction, an illness...

Basically, we retreat to old fail-safe positions.

Paradoxically, these old behaviors are almost always ineffective!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

PRESET CHECK LIST

These defaults are old places we go when we're down or angry, tired or hurt.

What are your defaults?

          Rage?  Kvetching?  Acting hyper?  Drinking?  Over eating?

What events knock you into these old behaviors?

How long do you stay in this position?

What function does it have for you?

PRESETS

Ever wonder why we have presets on our car sound systems?

Presets on our phones?

Of course you don't wonder.

It makes life easier, right?

No need to think.  

Just push a button and voila!

It's easy.  It's comfortable.

No out of the blue surprises…

What do ya say?

Ever think about your emotional presets?