Wednesday, November 4, 2015

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - 'BE NICE!'

Pushing back when someone steps on your foot, metaphorical or literal, seems like a no-brainer, right?

How have we developed the idea that it's okay to tolerate the hit?

Remember hearing any of these:

'You're bigger than that!'
'Be nice!'
'They didn't mean it!'
'Don't be so intolerant and demanding!'
'No one will ever like you and you'll be ALL ALONE!'

Unfortunately, the well intentioned exhortations of parents and teachers tend to relay the message that people stomping on our emotional boundaries is both acceptable and normal.




DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

'MAKING NICE' IS TOXIC - TO YOU… AND BELITTLING TO THE RECEPIENT!

Consider: 

The bottom line is that you are allowing someone to cause you harm and giving them the message that their behavior is okay…

What does that say about your beliefs about them?

Do you do this with people you respect?

Is there perhaps some hidden contempt on your part?

Aren't you telling that person that you think they are incapable of acting decently?




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