SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - INTIMIDATION

The whole issue of intimidation and submission is front and center these days.

The horrible and appalling stories in the news are affecting all of us, making us question our own histories.

The good news is this behavior is finally being outed.

Will it change underlying desire on the part of the perpetrators to intimidate and bully others to their will?

Your answer depends on both your own experience and your faith in the nature of our species.

What we can realistically hope, however, is that this publicity will enable us to better educate and empower ourselves.

We need to recognize the desire on the part of the doer to induce fear, to play on our sense of being in a weaker position and to frighten us into doing what they want.

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

ARE YOU SUSCEPTABLE?

Think about what forces might have made you susceptible to bullying and intimidation.

In many ways we are habituated to accepting the control of those in power from a very young age…

Ask yourself what voices from your early years might have contributed to a predisposition to 'cave'.

Do you feel guilty if you say 'no'?

What do you perceive is the underlying threat to you?

WHERE'S THE POWER?

"I knew it wasn't good for me to do but…"

"I didn't really feel like I had a choice."

"You know," she continued, "I felt my job was on the line."

He told me a similar story only in his case it had to do with a medical treatment he had questions about…

What do ya say?

Ever find yourself reacting like this in a situation where you felt someone else held all the power?

How did you handle it?

BEEN THERE…

He started the meeting with a familiar, old refrain.

"Everything bad happens to me!  My life is sh@#!"

"Whoa," I thought, "he hasn't said that in awhile.  I wonder what triggered that old tune…"

Hers was a different tune - but also old:

"I made a mistake," she lamented in a pitiful voice, "and now it's all ruined!  I spoke up and should have kept my mouth shut!"

I hadn't heard that from her in a long time either, and also wondered what prompted that old wimpy place.

What do ya say?

Ever catch yourself singing old tunes?

Ever wonder why?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - THE SEDUCTION OF 'INSTANT'

Our Western Culture has been intrigued with the concept of NOW and immediate. 

In our current social media culture, 'instant' has taken on an even more prominent position.

Our Native Cultures had a different view - perhaps because they were more connected to nature.

Our internal human system - our neurology, psychology and physiology have their own logic that needs to be respected.

If we look for instant change, we get discouraged.

If we believe in instant internal change, we sabotage our actual forward momentum by not recognizing it!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                          

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

5 STEPS FOR CHANGE

We've been here before, but when it comes to positive change, these steps are crucial!

1)  Look for the mini shifts

2)  Be compassionate with yourself

3)  Acknowledge what you are doing

4)  Appreciate your efforts

5)  Applaud your changes

KIIAAH!

"It all sounds so simple," he said, "but…"

He looked at me despairingly.

"How come I don't get it" he moaned.

"How come I keep doing the same stuff over and over again?"

He was talking about repeating old emotional patterns... 

So, I told him the oft-repeated words of a revered Kung Fu Master:

"The method is very simple," the master said casually, "it is the perseverance that is most difficult…" (The Complete Book of Shaolin by Wong Kiew Kit)

What do ya say?

You get it, right?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - BALANCING THE DARK WITH LIGHT

Crucial to our healthy survival is finding a way to not let the negative become our total reality - even when it feels that way!

It's easy to find and focus on the nasty bits - the days' news, a negative comment, a crossed eye glance - no denying they are out there.

Maybe it takes a little more focus to find the light, but with practice, the rewards are immense!

The sparkle of light, the movement of the sun, an unexpected smile - if we let them fill us, even for a moment - we create balance and perhaps as that old belief goes, as we heal ourselves, we also heal our world!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

THE PRACTICE OF INTERNALIZING LIGHT

It really is about practice - and volition!

Remember the White Queen in Alice in Wonderland and her mantra of believing a certain number of impossible things before breakfast?

Can you find 3 tiny moments of light in your day?

What happens as you do this?

TIME OUT

I was going to start this weeks post by talking about how current events are affecting everyone - how most meetings now begin with 'can you believe?' or 'OMG I can't believe!'

How the stress of each days' 'breaking news' permeates everything, and, more importantly how to take care of ourselves so that these constant external stressors don't overwhelm our lives.

As I began my research something caught my eye…

My breathing changed and I began laughing as I got lost in the world of baby pandas at an amazing place called Chengdu…

want a smile?

What do ya say?  You do get the point, right?