SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - CRASH LANDINGS

How many times in our lives is the 'runway too short' - but we persist in trying to come in for a landing anyway?

Instead of backing off and viewing the limitations of a situation (the runway) and making realistic plans, we often just keep trying.

There are many sayings in our cultures that applaud persistence:

'Fake it 'til you make it'

'Try, try again'

We've all heard them and probably been influenced by the hype!

Why 'hype'?

Because, for us, like the hawk in yesterday's post, taking a realistic scan and re-grouping can save our feathers!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

Think about some of the times when you persisted unrealistically instead of stepping back and analyzing the situation, and either giving up or finding a new strategy.

Check out your interactions with others:

Do you say:  'If I just try hard enough, talk loud enough, they'll hear me and understand…

How about trying to reach diet, weight or exercise goals?

How often have you put yourself through the same plan, crashed, and then figured you just had to try harder?

NOW THINK ABOUT THE POTENTIAL FOR A NEW SCRIPT…

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - DETERMINED…OR…

There is a big difference between persistence and obstinacy.

Persistence is connected to forward momentum and can have an element of flexibility.

Obstinacy is blocked energy.

If you feel like you are knocking your head against a wall, that's obstinacy.

Determination is about keeping a goal in sight - aiming for a result - but having the ability to review and change the method as needed!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

ARE YOU DETERMINED…OR OBSTINATE?

Think about some of your goals, especially the ones that you find challenging. 

How do you go about trying to achieve your objective?

Do you keep doing the same things and feel discouraged when you don't accomplish that goal?

Do you fault yourself for the lack of success?

Do you fault others?

Get angry?

HANG IN THERE

"He said I was very 'deter-mined'," she told me grinning.

Huh?

"You know," she explained, "no matter what happens I don't give up!"

"I fall and crash, I fail, but I just keep retreading…"

"Some people think I'm nuts," she continued.

"But seriously, I enjoy the challenge… and besides, what's the alternative?"

What do ya say?  Is this you?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - FINDING BALANCE

Here's today's question:  When do patience, persistence, and determination morph into stubbornness?

How do we mark that boundary between hitting our heads against the wall and giving up too soon?

An interesting and important question, right?

On the one side strength, on the other side rigidity…

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

FEEL THE DIFFERENCE!

Here's an interesting way of thinking about these feelings:

Persistence, patience and determination have a certain 'color' and 'sound' - a feeling of 'Yes!

Stubbornness is a different 'color'.

Can you let yourself experience that difference?

Imagine giving a color to each of these emotional states.  

What would it be?

Now imagine giving them a sound.  

Try this until you hit something that feels right.  

Try humming it. 

The idea is that the sound or color becomes almost automatic, and gives you an emotional heads up.

The goal is to help you experience when you shift from healthy and strong to rigid and stultifying.

I'LL GET IT!

I'm sitting in the doctor's waiting room when an elderly, clearly handicapped man drops a wrapped toothpick on the floor.

"I'll get it!" I scream as he totters back and forth honing in on that tiny sliver.

He clearly does not want help and I watch hypnotized as his body weaves and wobbles slowly, very slowly, getting closer and closer to his goal.

Whoa!

What do ya say?

Is this a lesson in persistence and patience, or what?

PICK YOURSELF UP…

How many times can you crash and burn at a particular task or goal and still get up and get back in the game?

Of course there's always changing the game plan and trying something different…

BUT …

Sometimes the plan really is good and it's just …  well… you!

Let's face it, no one ever said it had to work the first 100 times…

What do ya say?

Can you let yourself keep trying?

Join us at www.thehumandance.com

and to laugh as you learn check out our YouTube Beat the Bully series

The Human Dance "Beat the Bully!" Episode IX

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - GOING DOWN FOR THE THIRD TIME

 There's a great song by the Supremes "Going Down for the Third Time"…   Fun to listen to, awful to do! 

check it out

Remember that saying, "Insanity is doing the same behavior again and again and expecting different results…"

So what keeps us normally well adjusted humans hooked in to this crazy belief that sooner or later banging our heads against that same old wall will actually make a difference? 

Well, we do have a strong value on persistence in our culture - maybe that's part of it…

And we like to think of ourselves as being optimistic, right?  

And don't forget that whole thing about giving the other guy the benefit of the doubt…

But let's face it, when you're going for thirds on that same non-functional behavior, trying once again to get through to that same resistant person, it just might be time to step back and ask yourself:  Why are you wasting your precious time?

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun

ideas...

WHAT'S THE HOOK?

When you find yourself stuck in a bad situation, try asking yourself the following questions:

What would giving up on this situation mean?

What do you think you'd lose?

What do you think walking away would say about you?

What do you think your persistence says about you?

What keeps you from changing your strategy when it isn't working?

How have you been rewarded for hanging on?

How do you think you'd be judged for walking away?

Who are the people who would judge you?

What power do you gain from your persistence?

What power do you lose from staying in a bad situation?

What does letting go really mean for you?

Would you leave the situation or change your expectations?

To explore any of these topics type a key word into the search field on the upper left of the Blog.

To comment just place your cursor over the word 'comments' (sometimes it says 'no comments') below. 

Remember we are also at:  www.thehumandance.com