SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - SHORT-HANDING…

Creating categories to slot people and experiences into is part of the way we humans try to simplify our reality.

It's a pervasive behavior though out all cultures.  Our labels are intended to create a short-hand to help us in our interactions with our complex worlds.

In reality, instead of making our lives easier, these labels we paste onto others can actually distort reality, creating additional stress, anger and exclusion.

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

CHECK OUT YOUR OWN SHORT-HAND

Think about the people who touch your life - those you are close to and those on the periphery…

How do you define them?  In relation to you?  In relation to others?

Think about the words you use to describe them:  generous, selfish, controlling, insecure?

What made you choose those labels?  Are they really based on your own experience or did you hear them from others?

What would happen if you took a totally fresh look at people without those labels?

ASSUMPTIONS…

"I hate when people make assumptions about me," he groaned.

"They base them on some weird metrics and beliefs about who I am and then shove me into these boxes…"

"Ugh!"

"And then," he continued rolling his eyes, "they treat me based on their story!"

What do ya say?

You don't do this, right?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - ANGER DENIAL

We are told we should not feel angry or be angry…

So what happens?  Do we stop feeling this natural human emotion?

No.

Instead we create a system of denial that actually causes a kind of internal combustion…

As we try to suppress this feeling it backs up on us and eventually comes out in one of several distorted forms.

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

CHECK IT OUT!

You might be disguising anger if you:

          Feel like a victim

          Use the word 'should' a lot

          Feel depressed

          Overeat

          Under eat

          Grind your teeth

          Refuse to do things that you know are good for you

          Find fault with others - a lot!

If any of these fit for you, ask yourself what you might be angry about and tune in next week for the next step!

ANGER? NAH!

"No!"  He snapped.  "I am NOT angry!"

Hmmm…

Red face.

Loud voice.

Clenched fists.

Age two?

Nope.  Adult.

What do ya say?

Ever deny anger?

Ever see anyone else do it?

Weird, right?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - PRESTO CHANGO

Magic has always held a special fascination for most humans.

Magical thinking allows us to expand the scope of what we believe is possible. 

We can empower ourselves through the use of our fantasies…

Our dreams and magical thinking open the door - first to investigating what we are craving and missing in our lives - and then to using the power of our imagination to create the changes we are looking for.

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

WHAT DO YOU WANT TO MAGICALLY CHANGE?

First, create your own 'magic wand'.

What would it look like?  Might it have a sound?  

Can you imagine holding it?  Swinging it?  Bonking things with it?

How do you feel?  Powerful?  Silly? 

Make a list of the things that you would like to be different in your life.  

Create a mental image of these things. 

Now use your 'magic wand' to create imaginary change…

See the images shift to something more pleasing to you.

Do this twice a day and check out what happens!

  

MAGICAL THINKING…

What if?

What if you actually had that magic wand and could bonk things and people and change them into, well, whatever you wanted?

Hmmm…

What do ya say?

What's on your bonking list?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - SCORE!

What is a goal?

We can think of it as target to hit - a destination to reach…

Goals obviously are not achieved quickly.  They have to traverse the tricky and intense currents of our lives, and like that metaphor of a river, there are lots of rocks, shoals and alligators that they have to avoid!

Without a strong and potent 'why', navigating that river and reaching the opposite shore is a no-starter!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

What are your 'whys'?

Are they powerful enough?

List your 'whys' - the reasons behind your goals.

Now look at your list.  

How many of the 'whys' truly belong to you?

How many are society's norms?

How many come from your family?

Now rewrite your list with 'whys' that truly belong to you.  

Try saying:
  "I want to do this for me because…"