LIFE TIPS FROM AN AIKIDO MASTER

SUNDAY SMILES

"Iron is full of impurities that weaken; through the forging fire it becomes steel and is transformed into a razor-sharp sword.  Human beings develop in the same fashion."

"Failure is the key to success; each mistake teaches us something."

"Be grateful even for hardship, setbacks, and bad people.  Dealing with such obstacles is an essential part of training..."

"Your spirit is your true shield." 

"The way of the warrior is to establish harmony."

       
O-Sensei Morihei Ueshiba  
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THE POWER OF WORDS: UPGRADE IN 4 EASY STEPS!

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING

Words shape our shared perceptions of the world.

The way we use language tells others about our beliefs and intentions.

How we use words not only affects our listeners, but also has a tremendous impact on our own thinking!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas...

UPGRADE IN 4 EASY STEPS!

The 4 steps to your upgrade:

1.     Get rid of ‘but’!  Use ‘and’ instead.  Big difference!  Check it out!

2.    Never say:  “To tell you the truth…”  The minute these words leave your mouth I know your fingers are crossed!

3.    Catch yourself before you say:  “I mean…”  If you said it, I assume you meant it, no?

4.    And please, if you want to sound at all direct, kill this one off:  “Umm…”  We both know you’re stalling, so come on, cut to the chase!

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HOW TO CREATE CONFUSION - ONE WORD AT A TIME!

“BUT, BUT, BUT…”

Once upon a time, a wise therapist said:

“ ’But’ is a dirty word!”  (Yeah, I know what you’re thinking – ha ha – forget it.  We are talking one “t”!)

Let's face it, every time you use ‘but’ in a sentence you are negating what you just said and creating mental fog and confusion.

Think about it:

                   I like him, but…

                   I want to go but…

                   She’s nice but…

What in heavens name are you saying?

                   I like him but I really don’t like him?

                   I want to go but I really don’t want to go?

                   She’s nice but she isn’t nice?

YIKES!

How many times a day do you create emotional mush for yourself with this one?

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SEVEN KEYS TO CREATING SUCCESS

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING

“The dictionary is the only place where success comes before work.” -Mark Twain

We focus and reward ourselves for ‘success’- the end goal – instead of work – the process we go through to achieve.

We have learned to be goal oriented rather than process oriented – which means our rewards – the proverbial pats on the head – often are too delayed to keep us motivated.

“Success is the sum of small efforts, repeated day in and day out.” -Robert Collier an early inspirational writer.

Maybe it’s time to reward ourselves for those small steps? 

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas...

Seven keys to success:

1.      Getting to day two counts - give yourself credit!

2.      Learn something about your project each day.

3.      Remind yourself waking up and going to sleep what you learned -
     Credit again! 

4.      Talk to yourself – you are either your worst critic or your best cheerleader.

5.      Cheers work best.

6.      Look for the nugget of gold even it it’s tiny.

7.      Remember:  Mightly Oaks from tiny acorns grow – I know, seriously corny – but hey – it is true!

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THOUGHTS ON MEASURING SUCCESS – ONE MILLIMETER AT A TIME…

“Why should I even keep trying?” Tom complained. 

Okay, he was really kvetching – you know – moaning and groaning…

“I try really hard,” he continued in that same long suffering tone, “push myself to the limit – and it’s all for nothing!  Results, hah!”

Now, this is a really interesting one for us humans.

Let’s face it, all animals need approval and recognition.

Your dog learns to sit because when he succeeds you give him a bone – and don’t forget that wonderful pat on the head!

So, what do you get that makes you wag your tail?

TOMORROW:  CREATING SUCCESS

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SUNDAY SMILES – TAXIII!

On my taxi ride home from work last night my Romanian driver sang me lullabies – in Romanian!  No I am not kidding.  (you can hear them too...)

New York City taxi drivers are amazing – one way or another…

Last week the taxi I had just put my groceries into took off without me!  As I stood gaping a second taxi cut cab #1 off at the pass. 

Driver #2 jumped out of his cab – blocking not only cab #1 but also all the other traffic zooming up First Avenue.

“What the hell are you doing?”  Number 2 roared at #1.  I missed a lot of the following dialog since it was shouted in several different languages all mushed together.

The final, “You moron!” was loud and clear.

Cabbie #2 rescued my groceries and backed down First Avenue skidding to a stop in front of me and accepting the cheers of the small crowd that had gathered with a happy grin.

See what I mean? 

Is this an amazing city or what?

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SERIOUSLY SPEAKING

Hearing is believed to be  one of our most important senses – again looking at evolution and survival of the species – we could hear those predators coming at us before we saw them…

Scientists are understanding more and more the impact that sound and language have on our lives.

Hypnotherapists, who use their voices to help us heal, stress how careful they have to be in their use of language.  When we are in a trance state it is believed that our brain may not process negatives.  Think about what happens when you say, “Don’t sit!” to your dog.  Ever wonder why he plops right down?

Perhaps when we are talking to each other we are always in a ‘trance state’…



DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas...


How do you ‘double check’ your verbal out-going messages?   Computers have spell and grammar checks.  What do you use?

For one day, or even one hour for those of us who are ‘focus challenged’, double check your communication.   How?
           
      
 Use your eyes:
           
           Does the visual response you are getting match what you’d expect?

If it seems off, try re-stating – remember louder doesn’t do it!

And neither does repeating the same words…

Try:

“I’m not sure I communicated that  well, what I meant to say was…”

                                              

                                               Or

“I think I gave you the wrong idea, what I meant was…”

Lots of variations on this theme – try your own and let us know the results!

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