Showing posts with label negative loops. Show all posts
Showing posts with label negative loops. Show all posts

Friday, August 5, 2016

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - GETTING OUT OF THE LOOP

Why hold onto self defeating beliefs - especially once you realize how toxic they are?

We've all heard people say negative things about themselves, ignoring any information that points in a different direction.

Haven't you wondered about this?
There has to be a payoff, right?

So, next time you're caught in a self defeating loop ask yourself: 'What is believing this actually doing for me?' 
'Is it protective?  Is it trying to get me to look at something that I am avoiding?'

It truly is a part of human nature to go in the direction of rewards - even when we might not see them!



DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS                           
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

TO GET OUT OF THE LOOP TAKE THESE 4 STEPS:

1)  Find your negative loops:  What do you keep saying about yourself? 
        I'm lazy
        I'm not likable
        I'm mean, selfish, unlovable, not skilled…

2)  Find the 'proof' you use to reinforce the loop.
        I don't have as many friends as others
        I don't make as much money as others
        I get involved with people who are not good for me

3)  Ask yourself when you started believing this about yourself.
        Who might have introduced you to this way of thinking?

4)  Finally ask yourself what might change in your life if you got out of the loop?





Wednesday, July 3, 2013

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING – HOW TO ESCAPE NEGATIVE LOOPS


One of the popular definitions of ‘crazy’ is repeating the same behavior and expecting different results. 

And yet, we humans seem to be programmed to do just that – and then suffer because we keep trying harder and harder – again and again!

Changing behavioral patterns is challenging, but if what we are doing is not yielding the results we want …





DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas...    


Getting the results you want?  If not, check it out.
To change a negative behavior loop:

1)     Where are you stuck?  Answer these questions:

a)    What do you want to achieve?

b)    What is your strategy?

c)    Does your plan work?

d)    Have you done it before?

e)    Did it ever work to achieve your goal?


2)     Where did you learn this strategy?

For most of us the problem solving strategies we use are learned in our early years – often part of our family’s ‘script’.

If it works, great! 
If not, take a page from sports:

In tennis there is a saying:  Never change a winning game – always change a losing one!





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