WHAT? IT ISN'T ME?

"If it were me," he stated categorically, "I would never…"

"If it were me," she insisted, "I would always…"

"And how come," they both demanded, "these other people didn't do what I would!?"

"What's their problem?"

Well… maybe… just maybe… it has something to do with:  

THEY AREN'T YOU!

What do ya say?

Do you really get this one?

to comment click below

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - THE COST OF INNOCENCE

Being naïve is lauded in our songs … and might be nice in a moment… but is not a healthy life strategy!

In order to maintain this stance one has to ignore all the clues - remember that line:  "Oh, Grandma!  What big teeth you have!"

In our fairy tales this innocence and naivety is rewarded with the advent of the handsome prince or princess and the pot of gold.

Reality is closer to feeling gob smacked!  Would you really want to kiss a frog?   

  

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

Accepting real as a positive experience means:

*  Giving up on being a fairy prince or princess

*  Getting it that the guy couldn't really climb up that tower on Rapunzel's  hair      remember this one?

*  A kiss never turns a frog into a prince

*  Ants don't always win over grasshoppers

*  Helping others isn't always the way into their hearts

Now take any of those myths you grew up with and turn them on their heads and see what happens.

What do you feel?

To comment click below

WHAAT JUST HAPPENED?

There's a photo of two little kids, around age one and a half.

The little girl is looking in amazement at her empty, open hand, and the little boy is gleefully, happily eating an apple that he obviously just removed from that hand.

The expressions on their faces are priceless.

Hers:  Total shock and bewilderment.  You can almost hear her saying,"Wuh?"

His:  Totally smug and satisfied, not even a smidgen of remorse.

Now the interesting thing is that I have met the grown up version of both of those children.

The one, bewildered, clueless and trying to figure out what went wrong.  The other, gleefully and obliviously enjoying those ill-gotten gains…

What do ya say?       

Bet you've met them too!

to comment click below

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - DISAPPOINTED MUCH?

What does 'disappointment' do for us?

Perhaps a strange question but if we think about it we really are almost always a participant in this feeling…

No one can disappointment you unless you have created an expectation of how they should act…

The more observant you are, the closer your expectations are to reality and the less disappointed you can be!

  

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

If you choose to overlook reality and become disappointed you need to ask yourself what you gain from the feeling.

Think about a situation where you have felt disappointed and check out if any of these possible answers fit for you:

*  I get to feel like a victim

*  I get to feel sorry for myself

*  I get to make others feel sorry for me

*  I get to make the other person look bad

*  I don't have to change my own behavior

*  The outcome is predictable and therefore strangely safe

ALL OF THE ABOVE ARE SECONDARY GAINS - USUALLY UNCONSCIOUS REASONS FOR HOLDING ONTO AN UNDESIRABLE CONDITION!

To comment click below

WAITING TO BE DISAPPOINTED…

"I'm always disappointed by her reactions to what I tell her," he groused.

Oookay…

Always?

So, why is he not changing his game plan?

Is he really thinking that one day, all of a sudden, he'll get a different response?

Or, is it possible that he's actually comfortable with things the way they are?

You know, being disappointed.

What do ya say?

Do you get 'secondary gains'*?

(*Secondary gains can be defined as the “benefits” people get from NOT overcoming a problem... )    read more

To comment click below

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - GET REAL!

So, what's wrong with fairy tales and make believe?

If we get that its fantasy - fine…

The problems arise when we buy the story line.

If we compare our real lives to the Hollywood scripts - we are in serious trouble!

None of us are airbrushed and neither are our lives.

The more we understand real - the easier it is to deal with!

 DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

GETTING REAL

List 5 TV shows you watched growing up.

What ideas did they give you about life?

How do you think this influenced your day to day real life problem solving ability?

Who are your all time favorite movie stars?

What did you admire about them?

How much of these attributes do you think were real?

What is your favorite type of movie?

How do you think these movies have influenced you?

Do you compare your reality to what you see in these films?

What life lessons have you adopted from popular culture?

How do you think this has affected your relationships?

How much has it affected your self image?

How clear have you been about how much popular culture has shaped your beliefs about yourself and your relationships?

To comment click below

  

CAN YOU DO REAL?

"If only," she sighed.

"If only I looked like ______."

"She is so naturally beautiful," she continued, naming one of the most cosmetically re-arranged Hollywood stars.

YIKES!

Is it really possible that we buy into this stuff?

And how about all those perfect love stories?

You know, the lovers meet.

They lose eachother (through no fault of their own…)

They are reunited and live happily ever after…

Didn't you ever wonder what that 'happily ever after' really meant?

Like what happened the next day?

What do ya say?

Can you do real?

TO COMMENT CLICK BELOW