FOUL PLAY!

Sometimes they actually think they are being helpful…

You know, whacking you into compliance because, of course, they know better than you do!

Sometimes they're acting out their anger in a way they learned by example…

And sometimes they are just plain mean!

What do ya say?

You're not guilty of this, right?

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - ACTING 'AS IF'

At least once in awhile we all step into truly dysfunctional situations… 

Sadly, families are sometimes perfect illustrations of this. read more

We can find ourselves stuck in the dilemma of screaming 'Hey, the Emperor has no clothes' or joining the group madness and taking on a really uncomfortable role. check it out

There is a third option in this either or dilemma - to recognize that there is a disturbance in the arrangement - and still act in a way that would be compatible with your own definition of healthy group dynamics. 

The idea is to empower yourself and not feel off balance!

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           

  An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas…

EQUALIZE THE IMBALANCE

Try these 5 Steps:

1)  First, see the situation for what it is - not healthy for you! 

Be straight with yourself!

2)  Recognize the explicit and implicit bullying that is SOP for dysfunctional groups!

3)  Remove the Bully Voice from the equation - whether it's theirs or yours!

4)  Call out that Bully by name and thereby diminish its power. 

    Try a mini imaginary dialogue.  Play both sides and... 
PUSH BACK! 
(This releases pent up feelings and allows you to catch your breath!) 

5)  Now decide how a healthy person would react to what's going on - 
and try it!

To comment, click below

SERIOUSLY SPEAKING - BULLIES, INC.

"It's true," the father said, "I only point out what he doesn't do well… I mean he doesn't need help with the things he's got under control, right?"

Yikes!  This is what we call the 'Birth of the Bully'!

In reality, criticism tends to create pretty destructive backlash…

Think about it. 

How many times have you actually upgraded your act because someone tore you down?

DANCE WITH IT!   EXPERIENTIAL APPS           

An opportunity to experiment with some fun ideas...

TUNING OUT BULLIES ~ TUNING IN COMPASSION

1)  Identify who's talking to you.

The Bully says SHOULD!

The Bully mandates behavior

The Bully believes it is always right

The Bully is MEAN!

The Compassionate Voice says' how can I help you?'

The Compassionate Voice says 'who are you and what works for you?'

The Compassionate Voice says 'I am your ally'.

The Compassionate Voice says 'I want you to feel good and succeed.'

2)  When you hear the Bully voice, duck and weave!

Get out of the path of this rigid toxicity.

See it for what it is.

Press the delete button to get rid of the Bully's mandates.

3)  Practice the Compassionate Voice on yourself.

This is your internal cheerleader - your true BFF!

~To comment click below and let us know what you think ~

And for a quick meditation break click below:

Http://tinyurl.com/minimeditations