This week's posts about dialoging with our internal voices created a lot
of comments… and questions.
This one's a pretty typical example:
"I don't get how this talking to different parts of myself would
make any difference! Actually, it sounds
pretty weird - but hey, I'm open-minded, so prove it to me!"
Okaaay…
Let's use the guy who commented above.
He was struggling with getting an exercise program going. He knew he needed it, but he was seriously
stuck.
Here's how
talking to his inner 'voices' could help him get past stuck:
First, define the problem. Here it is in his own words:
"I need to exercise, I know I do, but let's face it, I'm just lazy…"
"I need to exercise, I know I do, but let's face it, I'm just lazy…"
Now, let's check in with those voices:
Voice 1 is easy to find. It's the part of him that refuses to budge and has an easy
answer: "I'm lazy."
Voice 2 is always going to be the other side - in this case the part
that wants him to exercise: "But
you have to do it! Even the doc said
so!"
Now the dialog
begins. It might go something like this:
Voice 1: "You can't make me! I won't do it! Get off my case!"
Voice 2: "I'm the boss. I'm smarter than you and you have to do what
I say!"
Voice 1: "No I don't and I
won't!"
CHOKE POINT, RIGHT?
Now, if we
visualize these two parts, what might they look like?
How would their
voices sound?
Exaggerate
their images and sounds.
What happens?
Can you take
them to the point of absurdity?
Usually, this gets us laughing and the next step is to negotiate some
sort of deal. There are lots of
possibilities:
Bribes:
If you go to the gym, I'll…
Compromises: How about one day a week? How about 20 minutes?
And finally
Support:
Let's find a way we can both be happy.
You get the
idea. It's all about internal politics,
right?
You're looking
to make friends with those opposing parts and get them working together instead
of in opposition.
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