How do we step back and disengage from negative and harmful people and
situations?
One important part of this process is seeing and paying attention to reality:
that person is not controlled by you!
They have their own path and baggage - most
of which they had long before you came into their life.
They might want to blame things on you - it's always an easy out,
especially if you accept the burden!
However, if you take their blame, neither of you will be able to
untangle the mess.
DANCE WITH IT! EXPERIENTIAL APPS
An opportunity to
experiment with some fun ideas...
STEP BACK WITH A
SPITBALL…
Here's a fun
fantasy to try...
Remember those spitballs
from when you were a kid?
spit·ball / ˈspitˌbôl/•
n. 1. a piece of paper that has been chewed and shaped into a ball for
use as a missile.
Imagine you could wrap all the other
person's 'stuff' - this might include:
Meanness, blaming, finger pointing,
acting like a victim, not understanding, guilt tripping, withholding…
into a wad of paper liberally glued
together with SPIT!
Now take a rubber band, hook it over your
index and middle finger, pull one side of the rubber band waaay back, tuck in
your missile, and …
WHOOEEEE!
RELEASE all that negativity as it flies
across the room or out the window …
(As long as you promise not to aim at
anyone you can actually do this one)
Our goal is to highlight the ease with
which we can release all those toxic burdens that we have erroneously
shouldered!
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below:
"I did have a headache for
the rest of the day…" she acknowledged sheepishly. 
